Years ago (yesterday) I was struck with this idea for a home decorating show. I would call it Dress Yo Nest, Sucka. I’d host the program in a wife beater tank, baggy pants to accentuate my puffy boxer shorts, several fake gold chains from the quarter toy machines outside the dollar store, a hanky twisted into threatening headware, and a face tattoo. That was the extent of my concept, and oddly all thoughts came to me around the minute-twenty-two-second mark of “Gangsta’s Paradise”. Brilliance comes in flashes, I suppose.
Anyways, my friend cruelly informed me that my original television series would never work on a count of interior design shows were successful in all but the Gang Members/ 12- 86-year-old demographic and I am a heinous wreck when it comes to crafting, style, design, and other such artistic ventures. Also, there is already a show called Dress Your Nest. I was horrified to learn of the copycat program which was basically my idea wrapped in khaki slacks and a turtleneck without gunshot sounds in the intro song. I conceded that the market for crafting shows for Street Killers would be tough to break into and maybe a title like Turf Wars would be more lucrative. But the bit about my disastrous design? I couldn’t believe it.
WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING?
With dreams of being the next HGTV Design Star temporarily on hold, I’m taking my expertise to The Home Tome to share my obvious abundance of knowledge on all things DIY.
Jocelyn, a crafty, home-repairin’, mushroom-lovin’ gal in Nyack, New York invited me to get her readers “learned” as part of her half-part funny/ half-part serious/ whole-parts helpful series for Home Improvement Month. I think we all plainly see why she turned to me for craft contributions. Now if I can only get my guest post to fire off gun shot sounds when folks leave a comment.
I hope you’ll stop by The Home Tome, and enjoy my take on tackling projects like a champ: