I’ve got some pretty important news.
I am 93.2% finished with a really prolific piece of *work which has the capacity to change the world. It’s poignant, mind-bending, and a little brilliant. Words almost aren’t enough to describe it. It’s… it’s… it’s…
… not done yet on a count of a last-minute visit from a fabulous friend and her caravan-o-kids. Ever the gracious host, I immediately dropped everything (save for the donut in my mouth) and got my house in order for their afternoon arrival. Preparations were exhaustive and as always high-class. [Read: pre-ordered a metric ton of pizza and put on my fat pants for maximum leisure while girl talkin’]
Fear not, loyal reader. I plan to debut the piece of blogging gold immediately after our guests hit the road. [Read: Immediately after our guests hit the road and I take a nap… or two] Until then (tomorrow), I offer you a slew of ideas in the way of recreational activities to keep yourself busy.
While I’m away you could…
Make a sister want a gallon of 2% and a Marlboro!
*Ok. You caught me. So maybe I’m working on a vlog about rhythmic jogging. Oprah **says it’s “disturbing and something every human should watch in order to grow from mistakes of yore”.
**Or at least that’s what I think she’d say if she saw this sweaty, 6-feet of lady jiggle walking to ***Ke$ha’s song.
*** You know. That ****one about getting drunk in a club and love being her drug but also partaking in real drugs because the love drug was just metaphorical.
**** No. The other one about substance abuse. Or, you know what? Just all of them.