Apparently, A Music City Wedding Needs Music. Apparently.

Two weeks before the Big Day, our favorite urban cowboy rock star had to cancel. He was technically the third musician we had booked to play a live set before and during the ceremony. So, I handled the dissappointing change in plans as I had the two times before: I laid facedown on the floor and … Continue reading »

Four Weddings & A Roadtrip

Plus or minus three-ish weddings. Okay, so maybe just exactly one wedding. Math was never my thing. I’m chugging on down to Georgia today for what’s sure to be the beautiful wedding of my beautiful cousin, Lanie,  this weekend. I played an integral part in almost getting her kidnapped as kids. It’s cool. She had … Continue reading »

It’s Yertle The Turtle Again, Isn’t It?

As a college student, I briefly nannied this horrible shit of a Kindergartener. I say “briefly” because when one’s head and heart tells them to address a 5-year-old as a “shit” (even internally), it becomes clear that career choices at some point were askew. Also his mother paid me like a blind beggar, insisting she was shoving silent … Continue reading »

Festivus Ceremonious Maximus

It’s Latin for “rockin’ great start to the party, y’all”. That’s paraphrased, of course, but just barely. Whatever the root and origin, the ceremony was big and festive and bright. I am waiting on a landing of a cement staircase. Hide The Bride, I think this game is called. I strain to hear the music I’m told has started. I … Continue reading »

Does This Photo Make Me Look Phat?

As described by Urban Dictionary: 1. phat: adjective, phat·est, phat·er, phat· fo’ shizzle, phat· is whack 1. cool 2. Pretty Hot And Tempting ex: Dude! That ish is phat 2. phat: adjective, phat·est, phat·er, phat· fo’ shizzle, phat· is whack 1. A stupid word. 2. Stop using it. ex: Pathetic Kid: God, that chick is PHAT, … Continue reading »