The best thing my parents ever did was kick us out of the house. I get strange looks when I tell people that. I think they picture 5 barefoot innocents roaming and starving. They half-laugh uncomfortably in hopes that I’m kidding. Then that blatant pity stare washes over their faces. They want to pat my back sympathetically like … Continue reading »
I am a stickler for details. This is something old history professors found most impressive. Mostly everybody else finds this most obnoxious. If I was penning a paper on the origins of popular euphemisms, for instance, I would latch onto the old adage about beating a dead horse. Then I’d go out robbing equine graves. I’d … Continue reading »
Ever wake up and think “Self. You need to find the sexy“? Well, this post is for you. Consider it a guide, your very own How To Be Hot, Phat & Otherwise Desirable tutorial. I shall now recount my long history of the hotness so that you, Madame Frumps and Senor Blahs, might unleash attractiveness … Continue reading »
Of the many pointless things to do on Facebook- jumping into a comment conversation without invitation, poking folks, and leaving status updates that could bore your cat to tears (Just ate turkey sandwich. With sprouts!)- my favorite means of wasting time is heinously stalking people’s photo albums. A true creeper, chances are I know what … Continue reading »
In an effort to enjoy some quiet time, I’ve taken to whisper screaming and interviewing my niece and nephew for a scintilating news piece this humble, little blog. Prepare yourself to be astounded at how life’s most basic facts can seem foreign to a child’s mind and how life’s most large and abstract aspects can be … Continue reading »
