Who you be?

I’m Tori or, as some readers call me, T-Dawg, What’s Wrong With You, Ice T Hold The Lemon.

I’m not one for long walks on the beach, candle lit dinners, or slow jazz. A 2-liter of Diet Coke with Peter Gallagher sounds downright dreamy.

But why are you trying to woo me? I’m married.

In fact, I failed the old eggshell vs. hard white vs. soft white test so hard that I let blog readers plan our entire wedding.

You can read about that wacky matrimonial masterpiece here.

I’m a Music City mama, sharing my outstanding accomplishments in the field of parenting

(read: who knew Wham! was not an acceptable baby Halloween costume?)

I’m a humble master chef, decorative-ball-busting crafter, respected spiritual guru… and a total lying liar.

I’m a serial smiler.

I’m a solo flash mob dancer.

I’m a hot mess.

Despite my shortcomings I lucked out with a gaggle of hilarious and brilliant readers. Our post-post conversations are better than any post I write, and I am forever in awe of their wit and great hair and super cute boyfriends. Also, I always wanted to sit at the cool kids’ table.

More than anything, I find  humor in the humdrum and write all about the extraordinary things we think are quite ordinary.

My personal mission is to (after winning a hot dog eating contest and teaching my kid some Tupac wisdom) show that there is no boring life.

So pull up a seat, that 2-liter of Diet Coke. Prizes awarded to anyone who gets Peter Gallagher to show up to this party.

And let’s ramble on.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

Follow The Ramblings fun on Facebook

And for bite-size ha-ha’s follow me on Twitter:

@toristoptalking

Interested in contributing your ramblings? A little comment shy?

Email me at tori(dot)nelson@yahoo(dot)com

96 thoughts on “Who you be?

  1. I love your blog…you are very lucky to be a stay-at-home Mom, take advantage of it! Thanks for posting my site on your blog roll…

  2. “why one kid out of any particular family is always a lost cause”

    OMG – Yes! Why is that? Is this why most people have 2-3 kids…as they know if they only have one, that only child will have to be the lost cause by default?

    Great observation and one I am sure I will think about for the rest of the day. :)

    • I am a Twitter Virgin (I really just like calling myself a virgin for old time’s sake). I don’t know how to tweeter-er-ing (?) yet. Thanks for the re-tweet though. It sounds exciting!

  3. Tori,
    Hey, wondering if you’d be interested in guest posting on my blog sometime? I keep telling people about you but what better way to convince them but to have you post something. Let me know what you think. You can email me if you want.

    • Dude! Sounds fun! I’ll e-mail you and we can work something out. I do charge a million dollars per paragraph though, and my knowledge of sports is limited to ping pong. Will this be a problem? Haha!

  4. Good Sunday! It’s Andi here, from Double Dose of Special. I hate to leave this comment on an unrelated post, but didn’t see another place to put it. I just wanted to take a moment to thank you for taking the time to comment on my guest post on Our Typical Life. I appreciate that you were willing to share your thoughts with me, and that my post touched you in some small way. Please come over and visit me on my blog anytime.

    http://www.doubledoseofspecial.com

  5. Took me a while to wander this way! Sadly I have no good reason. Had ample reason for visiting of course, considering some of your devout fans. Silly me. Glad I finally got adventurous enough! Me thinks I will be visiting a lot more now…

    • I seriously forwarded a link to your site to just about every mom (pet moms included) I know. Hilarious! Thanks for stopping by, and I can’t wait to hear more from you!

  6. Hi Tori – thanks so much for checking out and supporting my blog! I’m still new at this! My mum and I really like your blog, too. Nice to see what other new mums/people are up to : )

  7. Congratulations, Tori! I’m pleased to report that you’ve just received The Irresistibly Sweet Blogger Award! You’re receiving this award because I really enjoy your wonderful writing, and you crack me up. To accept your award, go to http://howcanicomplain.wordpress.com/. I know all of us on here have very busy lives, so please feel no obligation to participate. If you do have time, pass the award on to seven bloggers that you deem worthy. Announce the winners in a post and include seven random facts about yourself.
    :)Sprinkles

  8. My dear Tori, I don’t know how you found my ridiculous little blog a while back (I’m thinking C. from Small Dog Syndrome), but I thank you for stopping by.

    Also, I think you’re delightfully brilliant. Please never stop writing. :)

  9. Hi Tori,
    your comment on my blog definitely made my day… :)
    I just went through yours and you write so so good…
    and did i mention… the picture of you and your amazingly cute baby is so awesome.. i hope you have got it framed… its super duper cute… :)

    • Aww, thanks! I DID have the picture framed… until a hyper toddler with a plastic golf club got a little crazy with his back swing :) I’ll have to put it back up!

    • I’m right there hovering with you, sister. Part of my hovering is ego. I hate to think the boy can survive without my constant face wiping and boo boo kissing :)
      Also THANKS OS MUCHHHHHH for the award. That’s super sweet :) Us Death Grip Moms have to stick together :)

    • “Fresh” sounds so nice! I normally get “Crazy” or “Backwards”, so thanks for the kindness :)
      P.S. This is about to get weird because we are relative strangers but I thought about cyber hugging you today after reading your Thanksgiving post. I am a big fan of honesty (even when it’s uncomfortable to write) and I was really moved and impressed by you for really, really sharing. So, to summarize: Hi. Nice to meet you. I’m here if you’d like to hug sometime.

  10. Haha I love your intro! This is the first “about me” section that has made me laugh! Congrats! You seem to be a pretty cool gal. I hope to keep up with your future posts!

    • Please tell me you lived in Orange Mound. I almost got shot there! I went to Christian Brothers. This might account for my random love of Ebonics and Chicken’n’Waffles!

      • Ha! That’s crazy. I was there until 2007. Seriously hoping you didn’t meet me back then. I was the sloppy words and smudged glitter eyeliner type back then :) Germantown definitely isn’t hood, but gangsta happens everywhere, right?

  11. Hi T-Dawg! I’m the blogger formerly known as Sprinkles! I started a new blog a few months ago (It started out as a weight loss journal and morphed into a blog). I’m missing all of my old blogging buds and am so glad that I just re-found you! I see that you’re just as fun and funny as ever. Hope the family is doing well! :) I’m now following you–again! :) Have a great day!

      • I’ve been well and very busy this past year! I’m happy to hear from you, too! I love your avatar picture. Thomas is getting so big! I need to catch up on all of your posts. I’m trying right now, very unsuccessfully, to pry myself from the laptop to go to the gym! Have a great day! :)

      • I go to a wellness center type of gym with lots of older people there. This actually makes it easier because there aren’t a bunch of muscle-bound guys in their 20s or girls who’ve never had to wear a one-piece working out there. There are some 80 year-olds strong enough to kick your ass, but I think that’s kind of cute!!

      • WE ARE THE SAME! I tried (unsuccessfully) to workout at a young/hip gym for a year. I found myself dreading going because the buffed up crowd made me uncomfortable. I didn’t want to run/ red-faced and puffing and in my baggy workout clothes right next to a girl who just walked off the Baywatch set. Then we joined a Y with mostly elderly members and I LOVED IT. They were so nice and not the least bit judgmental! I felt right at home!

  12. Hi Tori – I feel like I just skipped and danced. My feet were moving while I read your About. Your words and images have movement all there own. Thanks for the music.
    AnnMarie

Ramble on, little rambler...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s