Your Fairy GodMartha: A Wear It Out LOUD Giveaway

 They say clothes make the man. I was hoping against all odds that this wisdom was gender specific, but I think it mostly applies to everyone. We step out or stay in each day and what we do or do not (sorry, bra!) wear says something.

The bookish man quietly sipping lukewarm tea in the corner? His brown shoes and brown pants and brown sweater whisper to passerby that he is a mild thing. We take one look at him and feel sure about his mind, that it is too full of facts and charts, thoughts and ponderings to bother with the superficial starch and pleat of fashion. 

The rowdy gaggle of teenage girls clogging up the mall’s food court? Their hot neon sequin tanks scream celebration, reflections of what fun it is to be so shiny and hot and new. Their visible bra straps announce that they’ve sprouted boobs and are pretty psyched about it. And then there are those dangerous hem lengths wailing like a siren, a rebellious declaration that they’ve just learned of boundaries and fully plan on kicking down the fence.

In a grocery store line we wait behind a prim, trimmed, and proper family. The flecks of gold in the mother’s scarf  are exactly the shade of tweed woven tightly into her flats. A wrinkle-less blouse tied at the collar in an astonishingly symmetrical bow, the same shape of the golden buckle on her rich, leather belt. And if clothes make a man and a woman, they make a fetus, too. Three small blonde heads adorn three small tidy ensembles behind the golden Mother Goose. The gray stripe across one cardigan picks up in the gray polka dot socks of a sibling. Buttons line up all in a row as these children do, perfect and balanced. And I feel right then that I know everything I need to about this family. They eat organic groceries, display flawless manners, and practice sophisticated European hobbies because America isn’t nearly fancy enough. The children are thrilled to practice French while Mother exercises without sweating. I can imagine even a husband that I’ve never seen, tall and commanding and probably with a name and attitude like Francios.

     I am there, cloaked in stretchy pants with the bum fabric thinning, a baseball hat I found in a closet, and a loose jacket, fuzz balls clustering along the zipper, to distract from my woefully bra-less regions. So at this moment, this ragtag hoodlum is saying something, too. An outsider could conclude that I am messy, probably a hoarder of dogs or dolls. I don’t believe in mirrors and eat nooked Hungry Man dinners straight from their plastic trays while watching Dog The Bounty Hunter if the rabbit ears are feeling lucky. mumu

 I decided then to embrace another adage, that looks can be deceiving, and maybe we accidentally present to the world a jumble-stitched summary of who we are.

The man in the coffee shop is the leader of a brutal motorcycle gang. His tea is spiked with whiskey. Cardigan conceals tattoos that read like a roster of prison terms.

The glittered teens are all straight-A students who’ve vowed their young hearts to chastity. One volunteers to read book to inner city kids while another organizes a competitive Math League.

That glowing mom ahead of me might just be a wreck. Maybe beneath her shiny shoes are hole-y socks. Maybe she cries with relief to see  saggy sweatpants waiting for her at home.  In this case we should be the best of friends.

I, for one,  take extra care to eat my Lean Cuisines from a paper plate and keep Honey Boo Boo running for the family’s viewing pleasure. You got me all wrong, you see?

Luckily, Martha took mercy on our lacking fashion looks and makes it her mission to help us say something lighter to the world than “I ran out of coffee and just gave up on life”. She’s your very own Fairy GodMartha.

marthaheader

    The artist behind Linda Munequita Meaningful Jewelry stamps and molds and waves her wand about to give us brilliant statement pieces marked with some of your favorite statements. When I first set eyes on these shiny, wordy treasures my sweatpants rejoiced. This hand-crafted bling can do the talking, tell the world just what we’re about.

marthainfinity

marthabadass marthaeatpray

This adventure-loving mother of two describes herself first and foremost as happy. She might even have a ring to tell us so. Martha spreads this joy with Etsy customers eager to describe themselves, too. I’m thinking of commissioning a Redneckognize ring so folks will really get my essence. From the feisty fingers wearing a Badass ring to the zen, book-lover wrapped in the three simple steps to self-discovery, her jewelry says above all else “If you’re going to judge me at least get it right”.

   I had the pleasure of wearing a Linda Munequita piece to Walgreens yesterday. The rest of me looked like a mess because Martha makes beautiful jewelry but she doesn’t work miracles, people. I was dressed in lunch-stained yoga pants and hoping people would find my choice of active wear charmingly ironic. I decided to test the bling on one unassuming cashier: waving my wrist about, reaching the shiny hand too far across and in front to swipe my bank card, casually tossing some random Jazz Hands her way. She smiled and laughed with me. Something in the way she handed over my receipt said she forgave me my pants as she said, “Cool bracelet”.

    It seemed fitting, since we’re talking about those shiny slivers of silver lining that Martha share one of her sweetest creations with you. To celebrate the Tiny Spark Series , reminders that you are bigger and stronger and brighter than you think, YOU can win your very own Linda Munequita bracelet and wear it out loud.

marthalavie

Edith Piaf’s classic lyric is French, so people will assume you are fantastically sophisticated. More importantly it translates to “Life in Rosy Hues”, just the positive perspective our Tiny Spark writers have reenforced.

To win, Martha and I would love to know what statement your current outfit is making. {Bonus points for pictures because I like to laugh a lot.}

A big thank you to Martha & the Linda Munequita team for helping us summarize ourselves in style, and for teaching us never to judge a book by her cover. Just look at her bracelet.

Check out more of Martha’s brilliant bling HERE.

Become a Facebook Fan.

Tune in for more big, bright Tiny Sparks this Friday!

 

About these ads

69 thoughts on “Your Fairy GodMartha: A Wear It Out LOUD Giveaway

  1. My outfit today says I am trying to hard to look like I know what I am doing. I have a shortsleeved sweater that looked nice when new and I pretend it still does except for all the pillings and whatnot. I just bought a scarf but I haven’t picked up the knack for how to wear it or what to wear it with. But I tie it on in some attempt at complicated knotting. I throw a necklace on as well because I think more accessorizing should make me look like a fancy piece who has lots of money to throw around at accessories. Maybe wear with jeans and Danskos because my black slacks don’t quite fit so much after the holidays. Boy, do I need a statement piece that says I am at peace. Thanks Tiny Spark!

    • Amy, you are just about the only commenter who’s actually dressed in real clothes today! That’s a victory in and of itself. The rest of us in our saggy sweatpants think you are mighty fancy :)

  2. Alice, from The Honeymooners. All I need are big curlers. This is funny because I don’t normally wear my robe and slippers and of all days for you to write this post and me to wear this “outfit” was quite coincidental. This cracked me up!

  3. I’m just not sure what my outfit is saying about me. I woke and dressed way too early, before coffee. I have fuzzballs galore,but I did manage to throw a pretty scarf around my neck. I hope that makes up for the rest of my wonky outfit. It’s snowing anyway, and in my book, fashion mishaps are forgiven in snow. It’s hard to look when you are dressing for shoveling.

    Pretty jewelry!
    ~FringeGirl

  4. Well, it’s 7 am in the morning and we are all just now waking up. I am currently waking in a nice cream colored sweater dress (worn from yesterday but too lazy to remove) and because of the freezing weather, I just added some black leggings that happen to be old and have huge holes in the thighs (so are useless for warming), a zip-up hoodie and some thick black and white stripped fuzzy socks. Oh! And I can’t forget to mention the “There’s Something About Mary” bangs. Yeah- I’m rockin’ it! Outfit hair and all! My Gaw…

  5. Damn! You can really write, lady. I’m so impressed right now. Your observations are spot on. My outfit today says, I’m chunky and resigned to wearing whatever the makers of chunky clothes have dreamed up for me. They say Chicos, J. Jill and Talbots. I feel so powerless. Ha! I like to be disguised – let’s just leave it at that.

    I always play Edith Piaf when potential buyers come to look at my house. Some people bake bread, I buy roses and play Edith. I’m selling a sophisticated dream, here. “If you buy this house your life will be romantic and very French.” :)
    Like clothes, house decor can make a statement, too.

    Never, ever, judge a book by her cover. Wise words…

    • Talbots? You’re so fancy. I’m a Target bargain bin fashionista, myself! Also? Oh no. After reading “house decor can make a statement, too” I looked around. I might fail house as much as I fail fashion. Can Beige & Blah be considered a design theme?

      • haha! I shop Talbots only because they have a ‘Womans’ section!!
        What I lack in my wardrobe I try to make up for in my house. Heck yeah, Beige and blah are the new black… didn’t anyone tell you?

      • YES! I was about to rush out and buy a bunch of posters, but all that hanging and taping seemed so strenuous.
        P.S. Accidentally tried on Junior’s jeans the other day. Called my friend and asked her why she forgot to tell me I’d gained one million sizes. Apparently a Medium is meant for a smallish fetus.

  6. Why oh why did I read this now?

    My fashion misstatement is screaming to the world that I am the laziest person of all time. I’m wearing my flannel pajamas with the cardinals on them, dubiously clean. No shoes. Hair up in a rubber band. Glasses. And my lovely scoliosis back brace, which makes my boobs look like they’re bursting forth in one of those Marie Antoinette films.

    • I wish my boobs would burst…anywhere, really. Although I’m sure the brace is an actual pain. I’m loving the outfit commentary so far. Let’s me know I’m not alone in my pajama-sleep-faced-ness.

  7. This is a fantastic post and AWESOME giveaway. I really, really believe in the power of a good outfit (or rather, an outfit you feel good in) to change your outlook. It seems vain, but it’s all about self-respect, yo.

    Having said that, you should know right now I’m wearing 3 different shades of navy blue in my pants, crocheted vest and sweater, in a way that I think says: I don’t really have my act together today. I also have a pink buttondown shirt on under the vest, with a collar that screams, “Iron me, you lazy b*tch!” Lastly, I have on only the finest in pleather bootwear, so that when I cross my legs I make a delightful nails-on-the-chalkboard sound, all in the name of delighting my coworkers.

    • I’m working on the self-respect part. Most days my lazy trumps all. Also? Ironing. I don’t believe in it. The general public keeps telling me I should!

      P.S. You might just win with the pleather boots :)

      • *gasp* I really think one of those bracelets would bring out the fake leather in my boots.

        Ironing is what my hell looks like. You should have seen me try to make those giveaway pillowcases.

  8. Sweatpants, fuzzy socks, husbands oversized t-shirt, hair up in a messy bun. No makeup and 5 different kinds/ colors of glitter/sequin nail polish adorn my fingernails… :-S Kat

  9. Love your analyses of the people you saw. I’m sure you got it right the second time.

    I’m with you on the comfy clothes. I wear them as often as I can. People are too uptight about clothes.

    Great jewelry!

    Stopping by from SITS.

    • Thank God I’m actually horrible at accurately judging people. Always WAY off. I can only hope people are forgiving of my standard sweatpants look :) Thanks for reading, Robin!

  10. I love this whole post! And you need to know is that I am running out the door to hot yoga, so Picture this. I’m the girl in the stretched out sports bra and crappy old yoga shorts, topped off with a black polar fleece sweatshirt.(Whaaat? I haven’t been there in a while!) I’m also wearing a sleeping-bag coat, a black scully, fingerless gloves, multicolored, mismatched socks and RocketDog sneakers.

    I have to get there, yo. And it’s 32 degrees!

    If I could make people notice my bracelet, that would be a trick.

    • Haha. What I took from this was Oh, I should really actually do yoga in my yoga pants. I forget to actually exercise in my exercise clothes. I got all motivated for a minute the other day and did a cardio video. Thomas kept asking why I was “eskerskizing” in my pajamas.

  11. I am wearing homeless chic today. Light blue stained top with sea green shorts. The waist band is so worn that I can only take very looooooong strides to keep from sagging all the way to the floor. These shorts also come with their very own air conditioning by way of the holes they’re sporting. Braless, I am, because I haven’t passed the bra-needed barrier called my front door. As fashion accessories to this lovely outfit, I am donning peach colored Puffs, cuz on top of all the bully turmoil, girlfriend is also one sick bird. Oh, yeah. And purple fuzzy slippers. No pics, I’m sorry to say. My camera is too costly to replace as I’m sure my ensemble will crack that lens into a million pieces.

  12. Looked down and realized that my entire getup screams contradiction. It’s 9 degrees outside and I’m in short sleeves. My makeup is perfect but I haven’t even brushed my hair. My pants are baggy but my blouse is slimming. I’ve got a frayed, homemade hemp bracelet on one wrist and a chic Kenneth Cole watch on the other. I’m rocking both cheap granny panties and a pricy lace bra.

    In short, my outfit is as split personality as I am. *shrug*

  13. Really well written post. As every day at our office is casual dress no one on the streets who sees me would ever think I have a real job!

  14. Sorry, no camera. My outfit? “He’s found butt-high in the Goodwill box, NOT dropping off.” An old, faded T-shirt (with wolves, n’est pas?), permanently stained sweatpants (stained with adhesives and caulks – more interesting that way) and clean underwear (forced by the wife). Throw in a 3 o’clock shadow (what can I say, my face is still on Chicago time) that goes around the entire skull, new glasses (Praise WAL-MART, I have SEEN the Light!), and a “yeah, okay, what NOW” kind of expression, and that’s about it.
    Oh, and the lovely put-together mother ahead of you, with the three perfect children? Once in the mini-van and on the road, she uses swear words that not even sailors know, careens home through traffic like Mario Andretti on crack AND speed, slams the door open with a shoulder that would drop any FIVE NFL linebackers, and heads right for the wet-bar, so she can have a blood alcohol level of .5 (legal is .08) by the time hubby comes home.
    See? Your life is SO much better! :D

    • Hahaha. I might need to steal you Goodwill box, NOT dropping off line as a general description of myself from now on. Good call on the clean underwear. Your wife is a keeper. And I hope you’re right about the golden mom from the grocery store. Just seeing her made me feel 32% worse about myself.

  15. Bea Arthur. That’s who I look like today… Bea Arthur in “The Golden Girls,” but 30 years younger. Which is terrifying, right? And I knew it when I put the clothes on today. The tank top is a shell, and it’s pretty. A little sexy, even. But then the sweater over it, while apparently currently stylish and therefore proffered for wear from Express, is long and loose. Flowy. Sans attachments or cinches of any kind. It’s kind of sparkly, too, with glittery threads woven throughout its sort of dark tealness that matches the shell tank. And this goes over the gray pants that are now a size too large and that bear the old-style high waist. Not old-style as in back in the 1940s that are ironic and hipster cool now. No. These pants were purchased circa 1998. I think from Kohl’s. Maybe not. So they’re saggy-crotched and saggy-assed (not unlike, but not quite fitting, myself). I knew this morning that what this outfit needed some sort of chic legging, which could somehow look professional instead of A) trampy; 2) age inappropriate; third) completely NOT professional. But I don’t own such a legging. I only own the other kinds. On my feet are flats. Boring flats that, at least, are not the horrid sandals Bea Arthur insisted on wearing around on “The Golden Girls.” I bet she had hideous feet. I’m wearing flats because my back is jacked up and heels, though hot and still age-appropriate, just don’t do it for the herniated disc. I’m also wearing socks. They’re gray, matching the pants. But they keep sagging to my ankles, showing my pale above-ankle-region when I sit.

    I averted complete disaster by refusing to wear a long necklace or dangly earrings, and by putting my hair up in a twist.

    • This probably says something about my style, but your description actually sounds super pulled together. All matching like a champ! Also, I just realized with my giant height, sharp nose, and big ‘ol feet that I might be bound for Bea Arthur-ville sooner than I’d hoped :)

  16. “Looks can be deceiving” –> wise words that most of us tend to forget from time to time.

    I actually made a bit more of an effort today for work (we don’t have a dress code so most days I’m in jeans and a t-shirt). My outfit today says “she’s trying. A little understated maybe (everything except my shirt is either black or gray) but she’s trying.” When given the option to primp longer or sleep for an extra five minutes, well, you know which one I’ll always end up choosing. :)

  17. My look today, complete with scratchy, wool sweater and heavy socks says, “I’ve given up hope that the sun will ever show its face again. Sexy? Who gives a damn about sexy? As long as these toes can avoid frostbite and maintain blood flow, it’s all good.”

    I’d include a photo but that would require me to crawl out from under my blankets and leave behind the warmth of the fireplace.

    • Haha. Someone else had the same thought. We were just talking about how it’s totally ok not to try when it’s so cold outside. I just layer on every sock and sweater I own and hope I can still move my arms enough to reach for the remote :)

  18. i just loved your descriptions of people in clothes. first, the what they put out there and then the they might not be what we think they are… delightful. i could’ve listened to that all day… wonderful post. xo, sm

  19. Oh boy. I worked at home today so my outfit says “given up and hopeless.” I managed to put on jeans and a pullover cotton shirt and was cold, so I added a purple fluffy robe. My hair, unruly tangled curls pulled back in a frizzy pony tail. It’s gonna take me half an hour to comb it out when I wash it in the morning. The What Not To Wear folks would have a field day with how I’ve been dressing. I looked much better before my work went to year round casual dress. That was my ticket to seeing how close I could get to pajamas without having a sit down with HR. So far, I’ve gotten second glances, but no words :)

  20. I walk around wearing the most ridiculus outfits at home. Socks, striped bedshoe slippers, yoga capris, shirts that are too small and no bra. I look at my husband who has also started dressing insanely ridiculus and I say to him I would never have been caught dead looking like this as a teenager and I know The Dutchess Catherine wouldn’t dress like this.

    • Haha. I’ve thought about what my 16-year-old self would think of my current “fashion” statements. I’m pretty sure it would be shame and social shunning :) Anything goes at home!

  21. Pingback: Haute Mess « the ramblings

Ramble on, little rambler...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s