I had a post all set and ready to go this morning. It was a riveting account of my new, Fall wardrobe. In summary it was to be titled “Turtleneck”. You might be surprised to know that it was about turtlenecks. Dutifully, I scoured the web for the very best deals on quality, neck-hugging attire, so that you too could cover excess chins and droopy neck flaps in luxurious cashmere blends. Then I accidentally clicked on a link to Da Ebonics Page. I’ve spent the last twenty minutes referring to my toddler as “sweet thang” and answering his beggy requests for juice with a rough-voiced “Sho’ nuff, homey”.
The website’s Ebonics Translator brought street cred straight to my little, cracker fingertips, and now a post on turtlenecks just seems whack. So, I changed from my favorite argyle sweater into something a little more gangsta (one of the Mister’s undershirts, known as a “wife beater” to us urban hipsters). I feel incredibly cold and on the verge of sickness, sporting a flimsy tank top around in frigid temps, but my education in Ebonics has taught me that to be “cold” is to be “sick” and to be “sick” is to be “dope” and to be “dope” is to be superbly fashionable and quite on target with recent trends. To warm my bare-armed self, I sipped hot tea from my favorite mug, remembering to remark after each gulp that I am “straight mean muggin’, fool”.
As I look for a bra with better nipple coverage and settle in to translate some of my favorite everyday sayings into street talk, check out da ebonics translator on Da Ebonics Page and leave a comment with your best before-and-after pimp-speak.
T-Dawg’s Guide Ta Jivin’ Like P Diddy All Ye Damn Hood Ratz
My mother is such a lady.
“Yo muh motha f*@kin motha iz such uh beotch , wOrd! “
Why, that’s not what I meant at all. Mother’s weeping now. Thanks for nothing.
A blessed Thanksgiving to your beautiful family.
“Yo uh hoppin’ gobble gobble ta yo’ fine family what ‘chew thinkin’ man?”
Um. Well. I suppose I am thinking that I don’t know who Chew is or his thoughts on the matter, but it seems like you’re being a bit flirtatious and inappropriate calling his wife fine and all.
I am a fan of turtlenecks.
“‘Chew trippin’ foo’.”
But they keep your neck so toasty and sophisticated!
“Ya’ll is mad stupid.”
What are your thoughts on loafers, then?
“Yo loafers you know das right!”
Yes. I certainly do know that it is right.
Want to talk like a pimp? Translate and leave your new slang below!